tell a Model A related story

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More on Greed and Safety.

For ag operations it is not uncommon that two aeroplanes work together. If any condition deteriorates, usually increasing wind, one pilot always hopes the other declares he is going home or back to base. Generally it is myself that makes that declaration. There are times when I regretted working on in marginal conditions.
When working with Kev in Borneo was such a time. One evening I said to Kev I wished I had quit because weather had become marginal. Kev responded by saying it was quite okay by him.
This work was tiring, it started first light and went through to nearly last light. During the second refuelling of the day, (that's early afternoon which is noddy time noddy time) I’d eat and take a nap. I’d ask Kev if he wished to have a break and he’d always declined. He wasn’t paid whilst he ate or slept. One day at noddy time Kev went to sleep on takeoff. He entered the palm plantation but didn’t go far; about 30 yards and came to a stop- wingless.
When this job (contract) finished Kev returned to New Zealand and continued spreading fertiliser. One day he failed to become airborne and continued his takeoff into the paddock beyond the airstrip. He hit a post with his tailplane and lost control. Now Kev does not need to eat and he is taking a rest, an awful long one. And he is not getting paid.

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Aeroplanes became houses.

We lost a number of aeroplanes in Malaya and Borneo. When the engineer arrived at the wreckage of a crash the following day he found it had been scavenged. The skins from both the wings and fuse had been removed and weren’t to be found. However their whereabouts became apparent in only a couple of days; houses located in little clearings had been quickly erected and had yellow roofs. Yellow of course being the paint colour of these cropdusters.
If you were to live, like some of these people, you too would learn to be resourceful and improvise even steal.

[woofa.express]

This is part of our local aero club news letter. It carries on from the previous story and is about accidents caused by greed.

Safety.
Greed has its downfall.
In 1977 we had yet another drought in Queensland were I was living and working and my employer asked myself and others to try for a temporary job until we had rain and a return to a normal season. I took a job in Sedan, North Africa. Spraying cotton grown in an extended irrigation area along the Nile (Blue Nile). We were paid by the month, a sum of 2,000 USD. Unfortunately the exchange rate was not in my favour and gave me only 1,400AUD. Regardless of this a pilots productivity wasn’t rewarded which meant good performance wasn’t renumerated. However that did have one advantage for the operator, no one worked in unfavourable conditions, mainly weather. We had no accidents, whilst I was working there anyway.
Between ’96 and 2000 I worked (casual) in Malaysia and Borneo (East Malaysia) spreading fertilizer on their extensive palm plantations. We were paid on productivity. This had a renumerical reward and encouraged a bloke to get out of bed early. For the operator this did have a disadvantage. Greed. Some pilots worked in what was unfavourable conditions, mostly wet airstrips and personal tiredness. For this story I’ll make tiredness the topic. Although this incident was, at the time of writing, 28 years back I won’t name the pilot but elect to call him Charlie.
On the day in question it had been raining and the strip was still damp. Mud was being flicked up on Charlies aeroplane tail. His loader fellow pointed this out to him and commented he should quit for the day. He did not. The aeroplane became heavy and the aeroplane became out of balance until he could not control it; he crashed. Back in Australia he was spreading what CASA described as powdery fertilizer, which was probably lime or gypsum. This was in light rain. The driver spilt part of the bucket full on the left wing which didn’t wash off or blow off on takeoff. After takeoff the aeroplane turned uncontrollably to the heavy and airflow interrupted wing and he crashed. He didn’t quit because he was to end his employment with the operator that day, so what he didn’t do he was to miss that productivity pay. In both these accidents (aeroplane write offs) it was greed that had in continue in unfavourable conditions.
That's where his employment in aviation ended. No one would give him a job nor would the insurers cover him.

[Jim Brierley]

I spread fertilizer on a regular basis! Some people don't realize it, others think it is funny!

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Originally Posted by Jim Brierley

I spread fertilizer on a regular basis! Some people don't realize it, others think it is funny!

I enjoy reading the fertiliser you spread Bill. And your book too. gary

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This story of Bob Caldwell is one that I have published before and I had reason to publish in our local aeroclub newsletter. So Whist I have it on my desktop I'll publish again for you. Some of you, have of course read it before but perhaps not the second part. It's a popular story.

BOB CALDWELL.
At this time each year I have republished a story which I have been pleased with. This was to be of my late friend Bob Caldwell but I haven’t been able to find that story in trying to review some 66 pages, so I will write it again. There has been some sadness in reviewing past stories when I see names of Model A owners with whom I have become friendly and who have now passed. Names many members will well recall. Bob too has passed, prostate cancer and only 52. Here’s Bob’s story.
His dad, Byron Caldwell was one of the earliest cropdusters in America, located at Williams, Northern California. Byron and his wife, whose name I don’t recall, had two sons, the youngest killed in a cropduster and Bob, as I said died of cancer. Sadly both pre-deceased their parents. Bob flew two helicopter tours in Viet Nam and one always wonders if the dioxin in agent orange was a contributory factor to his cancer. I must defend the cropdusters and the farming industries and say in the 52 years I worked in that industry ( civil not military) I have never seen poisoning or cancer as a result of chemicals. It's an emotional subject. All claims I have known of are unfounded. Bob was also a passenger in the rear seat of an ag plane which stalled into the ground. He had no flight controls and had to wear it all the way down. One always wonders about that as well.
Bob’s ashes are in both California and Coleambally which is close here in by Tocumwal where I live. He was a well-mannered and popular fellow. Bob leaves a widow (Australian girl now living in Oregon ) three sons and many close friends.
In addition to his fine attributes he had an incident in Vietnam which is of notoriety. He had a bullet enter the right hand side of his flying helmet and exit the left side. I’ve seen that helmet; I have held that helmet. This story is ridgy didge. The bullet entered at the left audio piece then tracked left around the back of the helmet, been held in place until it exited via the left ear audio piece. Bob had exchanged it at stores in Danang for a new one and later this helmet was given back as a souvenir.
There was another sad deal. Bob had a 1930 Coupe parked in his oleanders that he had owned since a school kid. Bob never did restore it however it was given to a cousin ( I think ) in some deal. Hopefully it is looking smick now.
The picture is of Bob and his wife Lorraine on holiday in Hawaii.

This story below was sent to me by my long time friend Hugh. He was the official I mentioned earlier, the Ag Dept pesticides inspector. That's worth a read too.
Hi Gary
The account of the bullet in the helmet reminds me of a similar Vietnam war account. In the 1970s I worked as a laboratory assistant at UNWA. My boss was a former US medical officer deployed over there. A conscious but wounded soldier on a stretcher was brought to him and he asked him “what’s the problem?” The soldier replied “not sure doc but I’ve sure as shit got the mother of all migraine headaches.” The paramedic (John Ormond, my former boss) removed his helmet and discovered a bullet hole in the centre of his forehead. An X-ray revealed that the projectile had passed exactly between the left and right lobes of the brain, exiting from the back of his head. John watched him recover and saw him on a flight back to the US.

Below is a picture of Bob and his wife, Lorraine

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The personal profile of Bob Caldwell was received well so here is another profile. One that I enjoyed writing and I reckon you will enjoy reading.

Hats off to you David.

This is one of my favourite stories. It’s about a boy who was ridiculed at school. His surname probably lead to his nick name, ‘the missing link’ and possibilly his dad and other forbears aswell. . It’s of a farm boy, David Link and he went on to do remarkably well. I have published again because I always liked this boy, now a 52 year old man.

He lived in the agricultural area I serviced. When I bought a new (to me) aeroplane David would appear to check it out. He would appear again, shortly after with all the specs of the aeroplane and power plant. He was always interested in aeroplanes.
My son Dennis was in the same school year as David. When school finished and kids were seeking employment, 15 of them, according to Dennis had applied to the airforce for a job. I asked who they were. I had not seen a single one on of them on the airfield and not one was accepted to my knowledge.
David goes and gets a job as drilling assistant; a no future job. He saves his money and takes lessons flying helicopters. His successful career takes him to the Northern Territory mustering cattle. Then various jobs including fish spotting at sea in the Pacific then other work in Canada. He returns to Australia and takes up an appointment with National Parks and everything is going well.
The police aviation wing wanted one extra helicopter pilot and had 74 applicants. David got that one job. Today he flys the most interesting jobs in Sydney including around big buildings in day and night in the most sophisticated helicopters. And in the outback looking for lost people or marijuana crops and other roles. Still a pilot and not a policeman. Still preserving with the same enthusiasm and good manners.
I admire David, this farm kid who did well. Hats off to you.
Attached Images

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This tickled my humour. It's had me laughing for days. I hope it humours you too. The notice on the side of the pigs business class seat reads " I am the first pig to fly"

[woofa.express]

doubled up with story below in error.

[stevemclark]

One day at the gas pump as I was starting the car a man ran up to me and said do you need jumper cables ,your battery is dead. I told him it was OK as it is a 6 volt car then it started .Any where I go in this car,a 5 window coupe ,it is a show.Even though I have 1930 Virginia tags on it people still ask me what year it is.

[woofa.express]

Hi Steve. one reader, I think it was synchro, was asked if he bought his A new.

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What is this little cute fellow sitting on my fence post that I have used for my avatar? It’s an Australian native known as a “Koala Bear”. Australians will be quick to point out to you it is infact not a bear but a marsupial because it raises it’s young in a pouch. They, the young (joey) is born through mothers vagina and crawls up into the pouch: as illustrated . (A kangaroo, also being a marsupial is likewise).
They live in eucalypts trees (gum trees) they eat nothing but eucalypts leaves and they smell like eucalypts. They sleep for nearly the duration of the day and always in the fork of a tree. They grunt a bit like a pig when trying to attract a girl friend and have a proclaimed territory of maybe 20 acres. This proclamation is made by leaving their scent on trees they frequent. Scent from a special gland from below the neck.
Are they cuddly? Well I wouldn't pick one up to show my affection. Just check out their claws in the picture below. Would you. Mind you they are not aggressive either.
They are found, in sparse numbers, in the Eastern Australian States and into the South East of South Australia.

[stickshift]

Very interesting facts Woofa. I have always had an interest in Koalas. We learned about them in grade school but there was a misconception that they were like cuddly pets because they seem so lethargic. They sold stuffed Koala Bear toys in the stores here like the Coca Cola Polar bear which isn't very cuddly in real life either. I did not know they had three fingers and two thumbs. I remember seeing news stories about terrible wildfires in Australia a few years back, and the Koalas were perishing in the fires. Very disturbing.

[woofa.express]

THE FLYING BOVINE. IT'S A RUSSIAN SPY

There are some happenings that one never forgets and this is one. I wrote it for a local flying club and I think some A forum readers may enjoy the funny side.

The Flying Bovine. Yes, it’s true. A flying moo cow. It sank a Japanese fishing boat. And no, it was not a failed over the moon attempt by NASA. Nor was it intended as a military weapon by any western defence force. It was launched by the Russian military. You, the reader think it’s all fiction or fantasy well don't, just keep reading.

This incident was reported in many newspapers all over the world. It’s one of those things that one never forgets because it’s ridgy didge.
In 1997, the crew of a Japanese fishing boat was pulled from the Sea of Japan after clinging to the boat's wreckage for several hours. They were immediately arrested after authorities interrogated them about the boat's fate. To a man, they claimed a cow had flown at them, apparently coming from nowhere, and struck the boat amidships, resulting in a huge hole and its rapid sinking.
The crew remained in prison for several weeks until Japanese authorities were contacted by several highly embarrassed Russian air force officials. It turned out that the crew of a Russian cargo plane had stolen a cow that wandered near their Siberian airfield and forced it onto their plane before they took off for a flight home. Once airborne, the cow apparently panicked and starting rampaging through the cargo hold, causing the crew also to panic because it was affecting the plane's stability. They solved the problem by shoving the cow out of the hold while crossing the Sea of Japan at 30,000 feet.

Unfortunately, following Rules 5 (Look-out),and 7 (Risk of collision) won't keep you out of trouble when you encounter a flying bovine.

Source: Australian Financial Review, 16 May2000

[woofa.express]

Read number 1335 (below) first.

THE RUSSIANS ARE COMING.

So treat with caution the next swimming sheep you spot. If it is an airborne horse it may not be simply a mobil or standard oil promotion. You’ve got to watch these Russians. This albino dolphin has a transmitter strapped to it’s back with the wording “EQUIPTMENT ST PETERSBURG” moulded into it.

[woofa.express]

Dealing With Tiredness at Work.

I recently wrote about increasing the risk of accident when tired when it takes only a short sleep to return to alertness. This can sometimes be only a few seconds but should not exceed 10 minutes. Longer than 20 one can wake tired. Here is an example of an experience that bought this to my attention.
My work buddy had pumped a load into my aeroplane and I handed him a can of aerosol perspex cleaner wrapped in a cotton bath towel. The next thing I remember was being awoken by what seemed like a loud bang. My buddy had sprayed the windscreen, capped the aerosole can and thrown it on to a metal shelf behind my head. That took maybe 30 seconds. I woke, I was alert and for the entire afternoon. I went to bed that night feeling well and woke up next morning likewise fit and well. What I had done was to shut down my brain and restarted it. From that day I made a habit of having a sleep at the mid day refueling. I had developed a good habit. A very short nap.
Likewise when driving long distances. When I feel the nods coming on I’d pull over for a few minutes and take a nap or when I am with my wife let her drive. That does bring on another problem. Anxiety during my waking moments.

[woofa.express]

My New Motorcar, The Nerd Express.

I have a new motorcar. Not that I needed a new motor car, I didn’t even want a new motor car. But I got one, wanted or not. I hate it but I cannot tell that to the generous donor. It’s unusual for me to buy a new motorcar. I usually buy one 2 or 3 years old at great savings. Even Warren with all his money doesn’t buy a show room one. His last was reduced in price because it had been damaged by hail.
This thing, yes, it’s a thing, is so complex in the services. It has some 22 controls on the steering column which includes 2 small levers; lights, indicators and wipers. Each control has several sub controls. In addition to those controls it has a separate services display which includes radios, GPS plus I think about 8 more. Likewise each of these services has several sub services. I believe this is simply a marketing ploy aimed at nerds particularly young nerds. And the car fights me when I cross to the other side of the road if lanes or centre lines are marked. A dealer showed me how to override this but it must be done each time the engines is started. It has many other imposing habits. Was it that difficult to start the engine by simply turning a key? No, of course not. It's now keyless. Was it difficult to open and close the tail gate? Again no. It's motorised etc etc. I doubt if a dealer can repair much of this complex motorcar should it fail. Expertise is not available in country towns or indeed in a capital city.
It tells us to obey traffic regulations and we must agree by entering OK. It tells us when we have driven for 2 hours and tells us to stop for a break. In addition it has a feature that informs thieves it’s security status. The side rear vision mirrors turn in when locked; if not it informs crime it is probably unlocked. Quite correctly labelled Hitlers Revenge.
I acknowledge there are some excellent features in this and other modern motorcars. Central locking, GPS, Cruise control, fuel flow, range remaining and reversing camera. The economy is quite fair and the transmission is delightful. However this is a dangerous motorcar. The dash and display need far too much referral which takes my attention off the road. I doubt if I will ever master all of this in the remainder of my lifetime even if I do live to be 105. Besides I don’t even want to learn all about it all. What a bore that would be. I’m more interested in my geraniums or even watching the grass grow. When I mentioned all this to my son he advised me to return to my Model A. I had some pleasure in letting him know there had never being a recall on a Model A. He had a quiet laugh.

[katy]

Deleted, wrong post.

[katy]

Originally Posted by woofa.express

Dealing With Tiredness at Work.

I recently wrote about increasing the risk of accident when tired when it takes only a short sleep to return to alertness. This can sometimes be only a few seconds but should not exceed 10 minutes. Longer than 20 one can wake tired. Here is an example of an experience that bought this to my attention.
My work buddy had pumped a load into my aeroplane and I handed him a can of aerosol perspex cleaner wrapped in a cotton bath towel. The next thing I remember was being awoken by what seemed like a loud bang. My buddy had sprayed the windscreen, capped the aerosole can and thrown it on to a metal shelf behind my head. That took maybe 30 seconds. I woke, I was alert and for the entire afternoon. I went to bed that night feeling well and woke up next morning likewise fit and well. What I had done was to shut down my brain and restarted it. From that day I made a habit of having a sleep at the mid day refueling. I had developed a good habit. A very short nap.
Likewise when driving long distances. When I feel the nods coming on I’d pull over for a few minutes and take a nap or when I am with my wife let her drive. That does bring on another problem. Anxiety during my waking moments.

Napping during the day is fine for people that fall asleep easily. Myself, usually about 1/2 an hour or more. During the day, forget it.

[Jim Brierley]

Woofa, what kind of new car did you get? I'm interested because I certainly DO NOT WANT ONE LIKE IT!!!

I took short naps almost every day during lunch break at work, and always felt god afterward. At 86 years of age, I still do, and still enjoy them!