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Hands down - your solenoid is not engaging. The "free-wheeling" comes from the cable being pushed in, sliding the shift rail into position like it should. The transmission is just waiting for the electric circuit to kick the solenoid into action, thereby engaging the pawl.
Have you tried swapping the two wires from the solenoid? sometimes these solenoids are rebuilt and the wire leads swapped - it can fool you. Worth it one more time before you pull it out and bench test it.